Tipless Best of Days and Worst of Days

Yesterday was the best day I have ever had since I have worked for tips.

I was hired by a five star hotel to work on a King; his handler said that he would pay my rate from the time I got there until his Highness decided he wanted my massage therapy services. I arrived at 1pm and was told to talk to his Doctor about his condition so his Doctor could approve me to work. After a brief conversation (on a week-end) with the Doctor, I was approved and told to check in with his Highness' private security at the Penthouse. When I arrived the security told me to wait in an adjacent room because the King was still asleep. I was offered drinks, room service, television & magazines. I ended up taking up all the offers because I ended up waiting 4.5 hours for his Highness to wake up, and when he did awake he decided he did not want a massage. So I got paid for 4.5 hours to hang out in a Penthouse room of a five star hotel, ordering room service and reading magazines. The total bill was only a few dollars less than my monthly rent, but to the King it was worth what he considered to be a mere pittance to have me available in case he was in the mood for a massage. It was the most money and the most fun I have ever received, and just because I got no tip didn't make it a bad day because I also did not have to work.

Today was one of the worst days I ever had since I've worked for tips.

A new client wanted me to work at the last minute and since my only other plans were cleaning my house, I took the appointment. When I arrived at the building, it looked familiar, but I did not know why at first. Pulling up to the front, I asked the valets for a cart and as they brought it to me they directed me to the SERVICE ENTRANCE. I suddenly remembered the building; it was the only place in all of Los Angeles where I was ever treated as if I was a Black person in the South of the 1950's. My last client here lived in the Penthouse and insisted that I did NOT tip the valet (and needless to point out, he did not ever tip me). After I unloaded all my things, I had to ask one of the three Valets (all Asian men) standing around to open the door for me so I could push the trolley through to the elevators. I was not allowed in the lobby because the Black man who worked the front desk literally came from behind his desk to point me to the elevators. Were they afraid I would stain the lobby with my presence? I felt like Dorothy Dandridge in Las Vegas when they emptied the pool simply because she put a toe in it. This new client was a younger version of my old client (I mean that both literally and figuratively). He complained about my rate and did not tip; I told him to hire someone else who was cheaper. He actually asked me to open his door for him as he let me out. It was appalling to me that everyone in that building from the Penthouse to the valet had such a horribly snobby and cheap attitude. I should have acted as Sidney Poitier did when he encountered the same thing upon his arrival in the US; he strode straight to the front door and refused to go to through back door. I will do that if I ever go back to that address for another client because I will never go back for the client I had tonight. My previous Penthouse client from this building passed away and I would like to live to see the day when the attitude of the people who live and work in this building dies.

Massaging by Numbers

One of my clients asked me how many clients I have and I could not even guess, so I counted. As of today, I have 215; but the number does not represent all my active clients, just all of them from the time I started. It would be impossible for me to say with any accuracy how many are active at any given time.

Some clients see me once every couple of years; one woman called me FIVE years after I had worked on her. Life happens, so with moves, job changes, children, and relationships in flux, massage is not necessarily an everyday staple. I was glad she had kept my card and called me, but I honestly can not say that I remembered her as well she had remembered me.

Other clients are regulars and I rarely go for more than a week or two without seeing them; sometimes I see someone three to five times a week when he is in pain or has a particularly stressful situation. Because of the clientele I have and my own personal preference, I rarely have set appointments more than a week in advance; even when I do set a weekly appointment, the date or time invariably changes, so it seems nearly pointless to say "Same time next week" except for those in the legal profession, who are somehow able to set a schedule for a year without any changes.

Yes, there are therapists who have a weekly set of appointments, but if you are in this business, be prepared for changes. Even if you work for someone else (in a spa for example), there will be no shows, rescheduling, last minute appointments, and time extensions. This is not the field for those who want set hours and set pay; go into accounting (or a legal profession) if you seek a working environment by the numbers.

The old saying that "When you make plans, God laughs" holds true in life and as a massage therapist.

Therapist in Pain

Sometimes the person who needs a massage the most is the therapist. Injuries are a common and unfortunate part of a massage therapist's life. One of the biggest expenses in spas is the worker's compensation they pay to employees who injure themselves. I must note here that I have no sympathy for the spas because they overwork their employees to the point of injury; there is no way anyone can work nonstop 6 - 8 hours a day on a regular basis without tempting an injury.

For therapists who work on their own, the amount and type of work they do must be self regulated; I have no sympathy for an independent therapist who overworks him/herself to the point of injury. If you feel you are doing too much, you must stop. Period. Independents have a choice and that choice must be self-protective or there will be no clients because working with an injury (or illness) is not a benefit to anyone. The client is not getting a quality session, and the therapist is only acerbating their injury. This applies also to illnesses, especially those which are contagious! Just as clients should cancel any appointments when they are ill, therapists should also cancel appointments when they are not well, for the welfare of their clients (and their own immune systems).

I recently took 2 weeks off for a muscle sprain (probably caused by one of my table loading or unloading exercises). There was no way I could offer anyone any healing when I needed it myself. The old saying "Physician heal thyself" applies to massage therapists as well.

Gifts can only be given from overflow.

Kinky People

Clients come in all shapes, sizes, and styles. One of the rarer styles is kinky or eccentric, but they are also some of the most interesting clients; two of my favorite clients are both eccentric and kinky, and yes, we are talking about massage.

One client asked me to get a log from the fireplace to put under his neck as I worked on him so that he could get the pressure from the wood as I worked on his arm. Another built a rope system on his ceiling so that I could walk on his back (the ropes were for me to hold on to for support). I have worked on people in their pool, jacuzzi, hospital bed, and on their balconies; it's all good for me as long as they are comfortable.

I bring a walker to some of my clients so I can walk on them while balancing my weight on the walker. I bring a shiatsu mat for clients who want a Thai style massage on the floor, and my table also lays flat for shiatsu.

Everyone wants someone to understand their needs and meet them (if at all possible), so what is normal to one person may be kinky to another, but in the end if you get what you need, you are happy. Whatever the client needs and or prefers is what I deliver (if it is within the realm of my skill set and comfort zone). To be truly successful as a massage therapist (and in life), you must offer flexibility; flexibility is not just something I give to my clients' bodies, it is also what I bring in my attitude to every client.

From Knowing Pain to No Pain

Most therapists go into this healing profession because they have experienced pain at some point in their lives, either physically or emotionally. I was surprised by the number of therapists who have had near death experiences (being shot, falling several stories after an elevator cable broke); they all found massage to be the only pain relief after their trauma. After feeling better, they all wanted to pass on the good they received by giving to others, and so they became massage therapists.

I wanted to work as a therapist after I danced professionally for 2 years and found massage to be the the only relief for my sore muscles; two of the men who are my massage therapists are also former ballet dancers. People who work with their bodies also know how to work with other bodies.

Sometimes the pain is emotional and the therapist's table is the only place people are able to let go of their burdens, sobbing with grief or pain as the therapist gave them a safe place to let go. I always keep tissues handy for my clients to either blow their noses from being face down in the face cradle or for times when their emotions need to come out as I work out the tension in their shoulders and neck; the pain in your neck may just be a literal metaphor for the person who is a pain in your neck.

They say the best counselors are those who have lived through their clients' challenges, and I think the same is true of massage therapists. Knowing what it feels like to have constant or sharp pain gives you compassion and an understanding of how important it is to offer some relief or comfort. To go from knowing pain to having no pain is a journey, and this journey is best shared with someone who has been on that road and can help smooth out the bumps along the way.

Paid Travel

I charge to travel more than 5 miles from my location; the amount is usually based on the distance, although for some areas with really horrendous traffic (like Orange County) I will add on an extra amount that may equal my hourly rate just because I will sit in traffic for at least an hour to get there and back. Sadly there are many areas which lack quality massage therapists and some people are willing to pay for good service even if it ends ups costing much more than someone local.

The furthest I have traveled for a client is San Francisco. He flew me up to work on him for 2 hours and since his friend was also staying with him, he also paid for another 2 hours for his friend; all this was in addition to paying for my flights, my accommodations, a nice dinner, and a nice tip. For those of you with calculators trying to figure out how much I made, I will tell you that I paid my rent in that one trip. The small hassle of me trying to check my table onto the flight was handled with a call telling my client what model and make of massage table to buy before my arrival. Oh, and of course he sent a driver to pick me up and drop me off for my flights.

That may seem to be a perfect client, but I recently had a client offer to move me to their location, complete with a 2BR condo, car, and a generous guaranteed monthly stipend in addition to referrals to his friends in the surrounding area. The location was not Podunk Iowa, it was Hawaii.

I am still considering the offer...I'll keep everyone posted:)

p.s. For those of you who are wondering about the reason for the generosity of these clients, the SF client's girlfriend called me to arrange the massage, and the Hawaii client wanted me to also work on his wife and children; so their reasons for wanting me had everything to do with my work and nothing to do with anything else.

Know Something, Know Nothing

One therapist, whom I went to regularly, loved working on me because I could tell him which muscles needed attention and he could zero in on them without having to guess exactly which part of my shoulder or back hurt. I also love it when someone knows their body, either because of surgery, chronic issues, or education. But when a client has some knowledge and they try to show off, they usually just end up embarrassing themselves.

I have also lost clients because of what they thought they knew; one client told me that his scapula was bothering him so I worked on his shoulder blade (where the scapula is located) until he said it was his knee that was the problem. He was silent through the remainder of the massage.

One person who referred me to a client said that the woman spoke French, so when I met her I asked her "Parlez-vous Francais?"(Do you speak French) and she replied "Oui" (Yes) so I asked her in French how she learned. She replied in English that she did not understand what I said and that the extent of her French language skill was already used up at that point. Saying that you speak French when you really don't to someone who does not speak the language is one thing, but I am fluent so I inadvertently showed her exaggeration for what it was.

It is always a mistake to presume that others know less than you do; preaching or teaching should only be done on pulpits and in schools. Having some knowledge but trying to impress someone by exaggerating what you know will most likely lead to embarrassment, so if you don't know everything (and no one does) please don't act as if you do.

I would love to tell all my clients that I really don't care how much or little you know about your body or the world; I would much rather any conversations we have be honest ones.

Couples & Jealousy

I work with many couples, and although sometimes I work in tandem with another therapist (one therapist per person), most of the time I work on both people, one after the other the same day or each person on a different day. Ironically, getting to the point of being a couple's massage therapist may require some psychology.

First impressions count, so for therapists who usually wear yoga outfits when they work, I would say that dressing more conservatively (wear a t shirt instead of a tank top, looser pants instead of ones that show off your yoga body) on a first appointment also helps set the tone for a neutral professional atmosphere. It should not matter, but sometimes, it does.

Jealousy is wanting something you don't have or think you can't have, but if you actually receive the object of your desire, suddenly the jealousy disappears, so it may be best to work on the woman first so that she knows your work. If you are a woman therapist working on the man in a couple, jealousy from the woman in the couple may surface. If you want to continue to be the therapist for the man, you must make the woman feel comfortable or you will not only lose her as a potential client, but you may also lose the man as a client. I highly recommend at least talking to the other spouse so that they see you and have a sense of your professionalism (and you as a person).

The jealousy usually has more to say about the relationship between the people in the couple than about the therapist, so always be as neutral as possible. When someone is possessive or uncomfortable with another person working on their spouse, their feelings usually have nothing to do with the therapist. One woman came in during a session as I was working on her husband to "see how he was doing", but actually she came in to see what I was doing with him (I was working on his neck). Her appearance was obviously an excuse to check up on him, which made sense to me much later when I learned that she was having an affair at the time (they have since divorced). A few clients have stayed in the room during the entire session with their spouse, and one actually wanted to film me as I was working on one of them (I said no).

Sometimes the jealousy has nothing to do with possible attraction, but is more about professional skills. A professional is always more proficient (hopefully) in helping ease pain or give comfort than a spouse giving their significant other a massage. I referred my therapist (a man) to a girlfriend whose husband got jealous when she enjoyed the professional therapeutic work more than the home massages her husband gave her; she cleverly resolved this issue by getting her husband a massage with my therapist so he could experience what she received.

He is not jealous anymore.

For Pure Pleasure

Although therapists work on people to earn a living, that does not mean that we don't also enjoy the pleasure of giving a massage to someone for the pure pleasure; it is just like chefs who cook for a living but who enjoy cooking a meal for their family.

What is the difference? The main difference is the intention of the massage. For clients it is all about meeting their desires, expectations, and requests, but for pleasure it is all about pleasure for us as much as it is for the receiver. We do the style and the things WE like when we work for pleasure only, again just like the chef who cooks what he or she likes for their family instead of what is on the menu.

We can experiment with techniques that we have just learned or never get to use on the general population perhaps because they are too exotic or too sensual for a paying public. We use products that are too expensive or too rare to share with clients. We do not look at a clock when we massage for pleasure; time is irrelevant.

How do you win the lottery and get a pure pleasure massage from a professional therapist? Be a friend, a family member, or a lover; but even all those relationships may not get you a pleasure massage. One of the last things a working therapist wants is someone waiting at home for a freebie after several hours of work. I have given my friends and lovers a pleasure massage for their birthday or in an emergency situation like when they are in pain and can not get to a doctor or another therapist.

It really is like the Seinfeld episode where Jerry expects the massage therapist he dates to work on him and she does not. Expected "gifts" are NEVER given and a sure way to ensure they will never even be considered. I dated one man who refused to have me work on him because he understood my work should not continue once I got home; I appreciated his understanding (and gave him a gift of massage for his birthday).

I trade pleasure with people I date, so if I happen to be dating a professional therapist, that trade includes massages, but if not, it does not. Just like in any other industry, you must be qualified to practice to even qualify for a trade; I have turned down trades from more people than I can count simply because their expertise and experience were not on par with mine. Aside from the times I have dated another therapist, I have never traded pleasure massages.

Pleasure massages are gifts, and the giver may give one for a special occasion, to fulfill a need, or simply as a generous gesture; the major difference between a pleasure massage and a paid massage is that there is no expectation, reciprocation, or money given in exchange for the gift, which is what defines it as a gift.

I do believe that it helps all couples to learn how to massage each other, so even if you are not a professional, learn how to touch your partner with pleasure; they will want to learn how to return the pleasure. One of my friends had my therapist work on her and afterwards her husband asked if he was better; she replied, "He was more skilled" while offering her husband the consolation that she enjoyed the pleasure of his massages immensely.

Skills can be acquired, but pleasure can only be experienced as a gift.

Safe Table

Some clients come to a massage table with secrets, either on their bodies or in their hearts, and they find a safe sanctuary under the soft flannel sheets, dim lights, soothing music, and healing hands of a therapist.

One lesson I learned from massage school was to be very discreet about any bruises on a client's body. My teacher said to simply note that there was a bruise and ask if it was tender, thereby acknowledging the existence of a past pain without requiring an explanation of how it got there in the first place. I have worked on women who had obvious finger marks on their arms and legs, and after remarking the presence of bruises on her body, the women said nothing more. They were obviously still involved with the person who had given those bruises to them and any further discussion might open the door to dealing with issues beyond their comfort zone.

Because I was trained in counseling and worked in a battered women's shelter, I have the tools to deal with a discussion about physical abuse, but many therapists are not and many clients feel vulnerable enough being naked on a table without also baring their souls to their therapist.

Some clients have secrets that they only feel safe expressing to a "neutral" third party, like a desire to quit their jobs, leave their spouses, or their problems with parenthood. Like hairdressers, massage therapists are the people who hear about the intimate secrets that are completely forbidden topics in "polite" discussions with friends, coworkers, or family members.

My motto has always been "What gets said on the table stays on the table." Like Las Vegas, my table is an oasis of peace and pleasure that lives outside the boundaries of "normal" life. It is the place to let go of all the burdens and pains. It is the place to breathe and relax. It is the haven where the focus on on YOU and your needs instead of obligations and responsibilities.

My table is the safe table in a world of reservations.

$5 change

I have written about tipping in a previous post but I had an experience tonight which highlights the amazing ignorance and arrogance of certain clients.

This particular client was referred to me by a third party because he was slightly unusual; the woman who referred him to me told me that he was afflicted with a muscular nerve disease but wanted a therapist who could work with that and still treat him without judgments or pity. Not a problem for me, so when I talked to him I gave him a discounted rate knowing that his medications cost a fortune and knowing that he really needed the therapy to maintain his flexibility and range of movement.

When I arrived at his home I realized I had prejudged him because I drove up to a multi-million dollar home, complete with private concierge, valets, and porters. Some people who are in need of therapy are in no need of money. It was a lesson for me not to lower my rates out for someone who needed no reduction.

The session was quite difficult because of his disease and because he was about twice my size. When it came time to pay me, he asked for ANOTHER discount, to which I replied that he was already paying a discounted price and that the only further discount I would offer him would be if he prepaid for 11 sessions and I would give him the 12th one free. He declined. He paid without tipping.

Several appointments later (tonight), he did not have exact change and since my fee was not a round number, when he handed me the money he said to me, "You owe me $5." I replied, "No problem, I have it in my purse." I was so appalled by his attitude and his stinginess about tipping me even $5 that I had to write about it here.

To phrase the request for change in such a manner was probably the most disturbing to me. He acted as if it would have been a crime to accept the extra $5 as a tip. He acted as if I would not give him change unless he specified that I owed it to him. I don't know what this man does for a living, but I would bet (at least $5) that he has never worked for tips in his entire life.

I tip valets and porters $5 whenever I use them, and now I may tip them more to make up for people like this man. My hope is that he will finally understand kindness and generosity when he comes back as a pizza delivery boy in his next life.

Royal Treatment

Some people think that clients who are very wealthy or very famous are also very generous, but that is not true 90% of the time. I have worked on Royalty (as in Princesses and Princes), movie stars, politicians, and professional athletes, and most of the time, they do not tip.

Yes, the sad ugly truth is that the rich and famous are notoriously picky and cheap. I have had them literally hide in the bathroom to avoid paying a tip. I had one Prince write a very nice 30% tip onto a check, and then bounce that check; I asked him go get cash and collected it from him the next day.

Some celebrities simply act as if they are God and refuse to speak or look in the eyes of "service" personnel. I had one actress who refused to have me work on her because I had the audacity to look in her eyes, so she had me work on her assistant instead. Another public figure talked to his girlfriend as if I was invisible and deaf, having a full on phone sex session with her as I was packing up my table to leave.

Professional athletes range from the physically challenging (working on 6 feet and 300 pounds of muscle is an Olympic workout) to the steroid insane; one client was having a screaming match with his fiance over the phone when I arrived, then had six beers to "calm down", and took a prescription sleeping pill before I started working on him. He passed out during the hour and a half massage, but not before downing another two beers during the session.

The only reason I still work on celebrities is the 10% who are actually kind and generous. There are a few wonderful people who treat everyone as a human being and who appreciate a good massage; those people are priceless.

Quality of the Materials

Quality costs money, and the quality of the materials, environment and therapist you get will usually* reflect what you pay for. When you walk into the space where you will be receiving a massage, it is worth noting the quality of your environment. What is your first impression? Do you feel comfortable? Do you feel safe? Do you want to be in the room?

It is the small, almost imperceptible details that matter. It is the cleanliness of the room, the clutter in the space, the smell and the sounds of the surroundings. If the place is dark to hide the dirt, noisy with neighbors or traffic, or if it smells of something unpleasant like mold or animal excrement, you will probably want to leave. You should. The energy of the space speaks volumes about the quality of the therapist; if the therapist can not make the space inviting, chances are the massage will not be soothing.

If you enter a calm, clean space with soothing music, soft flannel sheets, and candles or soft lighting, you would expect a quality massage, and you will probably receive one. There is a reason that the cheap massage places and therapists use disposable face covers and have clinical environments; you are getting what you pay for. If you are paying very little, that is exactly what you will receive in both massage skills and comfort.

*Except when you pay for a massage in a spa which pays the therapist only 15-50% of what they charge you.

Tattoos, Piercings and Screws Oh My!

I work in Los Angeles, so I get a good cross section of all body types, personalities, ages, and professions. One other thing I get is up close and personal to body art of all types, and since this is Los Angeles, there are more and bigger scopes of body art than say, Minneapolis.

Tattoos are now common and accepted by even very sheltered people as a form of expression that they may or may not choose for themselves. The old days of "Mom" tattooed on an arm are historic and nostalgic of another era. Welcome to 2009 Dorothy, where there are "reality" shows about tattoo artists (yes one is based out of Los Angeles). I have worked on people whose entire body is a living canvas from their necks to their ankles. The art they display reflects their tastes from the comic (as in comic book characters) to the Gothic (as in skulls that bleed), and everything in between, including tribal and Asian art. Tattoos are literally like a walking museum of the owner's personal taste and I find it both fascinating and beautiful at times to see what they display.

Piercings are also common, especially in women's ears and belly buttons, but this is Los Angeles, and once again the big city attracts bigger and more. Piercings here can range from eight (in one ear), to sizes (in an ear) that are an inch wide; these are not your average earring piercings here. There are of course many others in places that I never see which are draped by the sheet during a massage, but my guess is that if I see fifteen piercings above the sheet there are probably a few more under the sheet.

Finally there are screws. Yes, as in the kind you screw into a piece of wood, but in this case it is usually into a skull (I am not kidding!). I was working on a guy who was very heavily tattooed and pierced, when I felt something hard sticking out of his forehead. I asked him what it was and he told me it was where he usually screwed in his horns (again, I am not kidding), but since he was getting a massage, he removed them and so the screws were what I was feeling in his skull.

Every therapist is always free to decide which clients they want to accept or refuse, so if tattoos, peircings and screws don't bother you, you will have a good client base in Los Angeles; if these types of body art do bother you then perhaps you should move to Utah.

For the record I have no tattoos, three piercings which are all in my ears, and the only screws I have are the few that may be loose inside my head.

Jewelry

Nearly everyone knows to remove their jewelry before a massage; necklaces encumber any work on the neck, ankle bracelets get in the way of full leg strokes, and rings and bracelets will curtail any work on the hands and fingers. Most people would prefer to have their therapist massage their skin instead of their jewelry, but like everything else, there are exceptions to the rule.

Some people can not take off certain pieces, like rings that are now stuck due to weight gain or bloating, or maybe it's a Cartier slave bracelet which requires a tool to open and remove. Sometimes the reason is sentimental, not physical, like a promise made to never remove a wedding band or an inherited piece from the family's lineage.

However there are also just plain eccentric (or insane) people who refuse for no apparent reason. I had one Asian woman who refused to remove any of her 10 pounds of ornate gold jewelry during her massage, including a huge tiger bracelet that was literally two inches thick and wrapped around her wrist twice. Needless to say (but I will anyway), I did not massage very much of her body since she was almost literally covered from head to toe in heavy metal.

One client who did remove her jewelry called me in a panic after her session asking me to search for her uncle's wedding ring which she had worn since his passing. I searched high and low but no ring. She found it several hours later in her purse, but the moral of the story is to simply make sure that when you remove your jewelry, you also place it where you are sure to find it afterwards so that you can put it back on when you leave.

Jewelry is precious for many reasons, but when preparing for a healing, relaxing, and restorative massage, please leave it at home so you can show it off with your glow after your session.

Referral Worthy

When I can't get to a client or don't want one, I refer another therapist to them. This works both ways as other therapists refer clients to me when they are too busy to work on them or simply don't want to work on them (see my last post).

What makes a client referral worthy? It could be as simple as being overbooked or a conflict in appointment time for a regular or a new client. It could be someone who requires skills or is a size that that would be better suited to another therapist; as I mentioned in my last post, I do not like working on the dense muscles of professional athletes. It could be a new client when I am already booked with a regular. It could be an annoying client for a reason that is only annoying to me, but maybe no problem for another therapist. One couple I worked on had Fox News on every time I worked on them and their choice of background "music" annoyed me so much I asked another therapist to take them from me. It could be a personality clash that has nothing to do with massage, but simply a mismatch of energy or communication, like a hyper client who insists on techno music and wants a percussion massage.

What makes a therapist referral worthy? Ideally it is someone who has worked on me or whom I've worked with in a tandem, so I have seen how they work. Next best is someone who has trained with a school or teacher I know. And lastly it is someone who has been referred to me or has been hired by the same people as I have worked for as an alternate. These are the only people I will refer to my clients. I would rather clients find someone else on their own if I can not provide someone who is as qualified as I am (or more). Qualified also includes showing up on time and bringing all necessary supplies (like a table and clean sheets). I know many therapists, but there are only a handful I would refer to my clients.

Referrals are always for personal reasons, and a good match for massage is more important than all the bad ones that came before you found it.

Size That Fits

Yes, size matters; anyone who says differently is either lying or inexperienced.

One therapist I know asks all new clients how tall they are and what they weigh before she takes an appointment. She feels uncomfortable (and unskilled) working on anyone she considers "big", and she refers those people to me. People who call her and are referred to me are sometimes so upset that they never book an appointment with me.

It may seem unfair and cruel for her to screen her clients like this, but clients routinely screen therapists based on their sex, age, weight, and attractiveness. In a perfect world, clients should care more about a therapist's skill and a therapist should care more about a client's well being, but sadly that is only true sometimes.

One therapist I know refused to work on women (he is a gay man), and another refused to work on anyone except women (she is a straight woman). Every therapist must decide where their personal boundaries lie, just as every client must decide which therapist they want to work on them.

I have worked on very big athletes and when I have a choice, I always choose not to accept them as clients simply because they are very big and muscular and I am usually half their size; it is like I am the little green giant working on the big green giant. That is the only boundary in regards to size I have with clients, but of course, rude and inappropriate behavior immediately puts them into the unacceptable category.

I work on heavy people (over 300 lbs), tall people (over 6'4"), old people (over 75 years old), disabled people (ALS/paraplegic), fit people (massage therapists), skinny people (models), couch potatoes, week-end warriors, people in pain, and people who need pampering. My boundaries are very broad. I include many people in my acceptable clients that others do not, but other therapists usually have no problem working on athletes.

Everyone must decide what size fits. A massage should be a pleasant experience; both therapists and clients should be comfortable, and only you can decide what makes you comfortable.

Pressure

What constitutes heavy pressure to one person is a feather light touch to another. The size of the client or therapist really does not matter as much as you might think in the definition. I am about 5 feet tall and weigh around 115 lbs but I have worked on men over 6 feet tall who weigh more than twice what I weigh and they have screamed for mercy when they ask me for "heavy" pressure. On the opposite side of the scale, I have had men who are over 6 feet tall and weigh around 200 lbs work on me and I have told them that they were not giving me enough pressure.

Why the apparent anomaly of size and pressure? In the first case where I am the therapist, the client may not know that the psi (pressure per square inch) can be more intense if the person uses all their body weight on a concentrated spot. If I was to try and use only my arm strength, then of course I could never give pain to someone twice my size, but I don't do that. It's all about leverage and I know how to use all of my 115lbs on one point. The only time this does not work is if the person I am working on is heavily muscled (like a professional athlete) or a masochist.

In the second case, when I am receiving and not getting enough pressure it is because the therapist thinks that because of my size I can not take it. Wrong. During my training I actually had the deep tissue teacher (a man) use his entire body weight with another person leaning on him before I said, "Ah that is good!". Appearances can be deceiving. Nearly everyone who has every worked on me has been surprised when I say I want more, more, more pressure. One 200 lb male therapist broke out into a sweat after an hour of work on me, saying, "I couldn't take this, I don't know how you can!".

What is light to one person may be heavy to another, so therapists should always ask the client if the pressure is enough or too much during the session (several times). Some areas may be more sensitive, so what is good for the back may be painful on the calves. A good therapist adjusts to the client both in terms of pressure and areas on the body. Always communicate with the other person about what is comfortable, (what I call good pain) and what is excruciating (please do not hit your therapist, just tell them it is painful).

We can all get exactly what we want, just like Goldilocks.

Session Time

Most spas offer 50 minute massages with an occasional option for 80 minutes. One of my clients actually asked a spa to prolong his hour session to an hour and a half and they refused because they did not a) have a therapist with enough skills to do more than a learned routine, or b) they did not know how to bill it, or c) both. That is a sad testament to the quality of most spa massage therapists and systems. The good thing is that people who seek a higher quality personalized massage will look for an independent therapist who will most likely also have more skills.

I will not work on anyone for less than a full hour, and three and a half hours is my maximum. Every therapist is different. I work for an average of an hour and a half with most of my clients, but there are other therapists who work anywhere from 15 minutes to 8 hours on a person. From the mall massage chair mills to the luxuriously personalized private professional practices, everyone chooses what they prefer. Some clients are not comfortable with more time, some are not comfortable with less.

A therapist who performs a longer session may be more skilled or simply slower. A therapist who performs shorter sessions may be more skilled at target areas or simply not trained to do more. The perfect match is a therapist and a client who are in sync with the pace and time of a session; time is only one component of a good match, but it is usually a good indicator since it is one of the first things discussed when setting up an appointment.

Personally I like two hour sessions, both giving and receiving. What do you like?

Aromas

Since yesterday's post was on good hygiene, I thought a good topic today would be smells, both good and bad.

Bad smells come from either bad hygiene (see yesterday's post) or from the body odors or musk that emanate due to a person's diet or natural body chemistry. I have had clients shower immediately before I work on them and they still have a distinctive smell. I've noticed that the most hirsute men are usually the most prone to this situation because their body hair retains their musk. Sometimes it is the person's diet, and just as in war when the Koreans smelled the lack of a kimchee diet in the enemy, a spicy or garlicky diet processes into a smell on the skin (and breath). Sometimes the process adds a bit of gas and when pressing down on the back or belly, that gas is released and unfortunately without a gas mask handy, the effects can be quite devastating. One therapist I knew said he would have been fired if he had left the room every time one of his clients farted. So if you are the instigator, relax, we all have done it at one time and we will all get over the smell.

Aromatherapy is based on the idea that certain essential oils have healing properties or bring about certain emotions. It is an old idea; remember the three wise men bringing three scents to honor the baby Jesus? Some scents are believed to uplift spirits (citrus), others to calm and soothe (lavender), still others are held as the harbingers of love (rose). An aromatherapy massage combines the associated emotions with the scents and blends them to create a heady mixture to cure whatever ails you. One of the best defenses against bad smells is a drop of essential oil under the nose. Eucalyptus is a favorite cleanser of the sinuses and senses.

Most therapists wear no perfume and most clients appreciate a naturally clean smell; hopefully the client will arrive with that same naturally clean smell so the only aromas are those of the oils meant to lift the spirits of all who inhale.

Good Hygiene

Throughout my training, good hygiene has always been a primary concern. My teachers all emphasized that to pass the practical test part of our grades depended on whether we would use the sanitized wipes, and we would fail if we did not. Unfortunately once therapists are no longer graded by their teachers, their practices for their actual clients may or may not be as sanitary as they were in school.

There are many common sense rituals for good hygiene, like washing your hands, but unfortunately there are also many massage therapists who ignore both common sense and good hygiene. Reasons for bad therapist hygiene range from the unavoidable, like body odor on a hot day after working for six hours (or more, especially at a spa), to the outright lazy, like the therapists who do not change their sheets between clients. If you smell perfume or body odor when you lay down on the table, get up, cancel the appointment, and explain your reason; it may make a difference to the next person with an appointment.

A good way to gauge whether or not you want a therapist to work on you is to check a few simple things before, during and after your appointment. 1) Does your therapist wash his or her hands either right before or right after working on your body? Either option is good because washing after shows that it is part of their general practice, and they may have just washed their hands before you came in to see them. 2) Does your therapist change the sheets when you get off the table? 3) Does the massage environment look and smell clean? A therapist with good hygiene would not work in a place that was not equally hygienic.

Good hygiene goes both ways. As a client, do you shower before your appointment? If your feet have been in shoes all day and you can not shower before, please ask the therapist for a wet wipe (we all have them for this very purpose, and if the therapist doesn't not have them, that is not a good hygiene sign). If you have come from work or at the end of the day, eat a mint or chew some gum before going in to your appointment.

Let's all make ourselves as pleasant and clean as possible so that we can relax and enjoy the experience of massage.

Screening Clients Part 2

Even with the best screening possible, there are times when a client is skilled in the art of acting or subterfuge and a therapist will end up in a room with someone who is seeking sensual or sexual services. You may want to take a self defense class or Krav Maga just as a precaution if you will be doing outcalls.

If the client is overly aggressive, either physically or verbally, I tell new therapists, "The client is lying down naked on a table and you are fully clothed and standing, just walk out of the room". Leave your table, purse, and supplies in there. If you are in a hotel or spa, go get security. If you are at your home or an office, call the police and tell them you were harassed. If you are at the client's home, go to a neighbor or go to your car and call the police from your cell phone. Hopefully you will never have to go this far and a simple, "Please stop doing (or saying) that." will suffice, but it's always good to have a plan B, just in case you need it.

Even after all my years of screening and using my intuition, I had a client once ask me at the end of our session, "Is that all there is?" I simply answered, "Yes, please take your time getting dressed, I will wait outside." One of my friends (a professional dominatrix) suggested that I should have replied, "Well, I have a strap on, and for $500 more I can use it on you, and lube will be an additional $100, which you're probably going to want." I don't know if I would actually be able to say something like that if the situation ever arose again, but now I have a plan B ready.

Screening Clients

This post applies to the men and women who advertise and to the clients who call.

Ok, so now you have a free (yahoo's geocities) or low cost paid website (1 and 1), and you are listed in all the free directories. Hopefully now you are getting calls, and now it's time to learn about how to screen your potential clients.

Clients fall into several categories; the two main callers are those who are interested in a therapeutic massage, and those shopping for sensual services (e.g. sex). There are also callers who are merely calling to shop for a future possible appointment, and those who seek the least expensive service possible (sometimes in the hope of bribing the therapist to perform a sensual service).

For those interested in a therapeutic massage, they will get right to the point, asking about rates and available appointment times, sometimes asking about modalities offered. Those interested in sensual services will begin the conversation exactly the same way, but then they will ask about draping, special services, and/or specifically ask for erotic services. New therapists I have talked to have a hard time figuring out how to respond once the conversation goes outside their comfort zone. I always recommend that they say very simply, "I do not offer that kind of service, please call someone else." and hang up immediately. I remind them that just because someone calls you, it is not your obligation to talk to them if the conversation is not pleasant for you. A variation on this kind of caller is the one who calls asking for a lower rate than what you state and then offers you more to perform more services. The response to this type of caller is exactly the same, with the additional option of letting them know that "My service is strictly therapeutic at any price."

For the callers shopping for a future service, I advise patience and kindness because as annoying or time consuming as the call may seem, it may also be coming from a potential client who is as wary of you as you are of the calls you receive. There are many therapists who never answer their phones, who are rude or have a bad attitude towards callers who do not make an immediate appointment; they will never get the business of a new client who is checking on the level of professionalism and friendliness of their potential masseur or masseuse. One of my long term clients (4 years) called me three times before booking his first appointment with me because he was a massage virgin and wanted to make sure that I was consistently warm and professional whenever I answered my phone.

For clients seeking a lower priced massage simply because they can not afford you; if your rate is more than they can afford, offer them a referral to a massage school or a more inexpensive therapist. You can also offer a package discount if they purchase several massages from you (in advance) if you are so inclined.

All therapists have the right to refuse their services to anyone who makes them feel uncomfortable. The sign in restaurants that says "We reserve the right to refuse service." applies to therapists also. If I get a caller whose voice my intuition says is creepy, I will refuse the appointment, and I would advise all therapists to do the same. If you are unsure about a new client and you are going on an appointment, please call a friend before (with the client information) and after your appointment (to confirm that you are safe). Read the book Blink, which talks about assessing people and things in an instant.

Your intuition should always overrule your desire for dollars.

More Free Lisitings

Aside from the Google, Yahoo, and Yellow Pages directories, there are massage (and general business) directory sites which offer free listings.

Massage Anywhere is a massage directory so the only people listed or visiting are specifically looking for a massage; I do have a warning about listing here though because they accept therapists who offer "plus" services alongside the therapeutic services. One of my friends pulled her ad after she got tired of screening all the sensual calls. If you can handle call screening, then try this site, otherwise skip this one. Yes, even if you specify your massage is strictly therapeutic you will still get sensual calls, not only on this site but nearly all others (I'll write a post about screening clients soon).

The Rub Hub is also a free massage directory. It's new so doesn't have many listings yet, but it's always good to get onto all directories (especially if they are free) to get grandfathered into the system as it grows.

A general free listing for all businesses in Los Angeles is At LA. Because it is a general listing for all businesses, you get more competition for attention here, but it also has more reach.

Try them all and if you know of any other free listing services please comment or email me.

Free Directories

Whether you are searching for a new therapist or starting out as one, where do you go? Especially if you are new to town or have limited resources.

The first place I go to look for anything these days (like everyone else) is Google. Google has a directory which allows you to search for businesses locally; they are the new phone book for the cyber world. The nice thing for new therapists is that a listing is FREE. Just fill out the online form and wait for them to snail mail you a PIN confirmation number. Once you verify that you actually exist (through the USPS), they will list your business in their directory. The process takes a few weeks, but it is worth it. Yahoo has a similar service (although they get less hits than Google), and the Yellow Pages also provides a free listing that you must resubmit yearly. All the free listings are basic, so if you want better placements or if you want to add graphics, all the directories offer upgrades for a fee.

Find an LMT near you with a free online directory.

Diverse Clientele

The best advertising is referrals from other clients. I love meeting new people who share a common connection with me. The original concept behind facebook and myspace is to get people connected through social contacts; a friend of a friend easily becomes a new friend.

But even with the most well connected friendly people, most therapists but still reach out to new people to build a client base. It is important to get a diverse mix of clients. If the current financial crisis has taught us anything, it is that putting all your money into one area can have devastating consequences if that one area falters, as people who invested everything into real estate or into a Madoff fund have learned from their very expensive lessons. I had one client who was a stock broker, but since he was the only stock broker client I had, losing his business did not affect my business in the same way that it might have if all my clients had been in the financial service sector.

Diverse clients means they work in different industries, live in different areas, and have different interests, but share a common taste for massage. The areas and interests of your clients will bring new circles of referrals to you, and it is always fascinating to me to meet and learn about new things and places, even if you learn that you don't want to explore further (one of my clients came from Abu Dhabi, and I learned that I never want to visit that city).

Diversity can show you how we all share a common bond that transcends outward appearances, it can expand your mind and world in business and in life. Allow yourself to learn new things and respect other points of view. Do your best to meet a new person everyday; your world and your business will be richer for it.

Tipping

Today I will discuss tipping, the great, the bad, and everything in between.

As I wrote in an earlier post, if you ever use spa services, please TIP your therapist because their hourly rate is but a small fraction of the price the spa charges the client. I know most people don't know what a spa therapist makes (minimum wage to $60 and hour), so the fact that they don't tip may be due more to ignorance than to stinginess.

In EVERY circumstance where a therapist works on you it is ALWAYS a good idea to tip. Yes, even if the therapist is self-employed; he or she still has to buy all their equipment and supplies, pay all the licensing and business fees, drive to you, carry a table into your home, and do endless laundry.

How much is great? 100% is great, and yes several clients have tipped me 100% or more. What is average? 15-20% just like in restaurants. What is bad? 12% or less. What is the worst? No tip at all. Sometimes it's because the people receiving the service have never worked in a job that depended on tips, so they have no concept or compassion for those who do. Sometimes a client is simply stingy and selfishly trying to save a few dollars. I have actually had some people disappear into a bathroom to avoid giving me a tip.

Should everyone always tip? Not necessarily. If your therapist hurts you, does not show up on time, or does something you specifically said not to do, do not tip and tell the therapist why. Tips are for a job done proficiently, at the very least, and at the very best, done well.

Ironically the most difficult clients are usually also the stingiest. My celebrity clients are among the worst tippers; they are used to getting everything free and expect their mere presence to be their gift to you. Very wealthy people run the gamut from the very generous to the very stingy depending on whether their wealth was earned (generous) or inherited (stingy).

The best tippers are people who work or have worked for tips in their life; once you have had to survive on the kindness of strangers, you become a kind stranger.

Money is a currency reflecting of the amount of appreciation, respect, and kindness in any relationship, business or personal. People who are appreciative, respectful, and kind ALWAYS tip and tip generously. Those who lack those qualities in life also lack them in their relationships and tip poorly (or not at all). Therapists who lack those qualities will find their tips meager or nonexistent.

Whether you are a client or a therapist, improve the amount of appreciation and respect in your relationships with the other people, and money will reflect that improvement accordingly.

Insurance and Merchant Accounts

Today's post is all about business for therapists; massage clients, I'll write my next post for you.

Before therapist can begin working, many will require insurance. Even if a therapist works for an office or spa, some places require that they carry liability insurance. Basically this is in case a client sues you and protects you if you are working and your client slips and falls on an oil slick, breaking a leg. Some companies will include a free website as long as you pay your dues, so take advantage of the free advertising possibility if you don't already have a website.

If you are self-employed, you may also want to get a merchant account so you can accept credit cards and get check approvals. This helps when you advertise your services because accepting some form of payment other than cash is attractive to those who want to keep a paper trail and/or get mileage credit through their credit cards.

It's always a good idea to get all your tools in order before you start working; liability insurance and a merchant account are two basic starting points.

What are you worth?

Today's post is for therapists (or anyone who is self-employed) struggling with the issue of what rate to charge their clients.

Almost every new therapist I have ever talked to has had problems setting their rates. The main problem seems to be based on the fear that they will not get the clients they want if their rates are too high. I tell them, "You will not get the clients you want if your rates are too LOW." You will not get higher paying clients with discount rates because they will look at your rates and judge you unworthy or unqualified; your potential customers will always agree with what you believe you are worth, no matter how high or low.

So my first recommendation is to work on your beliefs. Are your thoughts based on fear? Do you fear that you will not have enough clients? Do you fear that clients can not afford you? Do you fear that you are not worthy of charging more? Do you fear that you will not know how to handle a successful business? If you answered yes to any or all of the above then your thoughts will create all that you fear (and more). Your fear factors will win if your rates are too low; you may get a good clientele base charging $30 per hour, but you will eventually burn out and quit, or you will hurt yourself (literally) doing so many massages in order to pay your bills, that you will be forced to retire.

So how do you set your rates higher? Your rates are a reflection of the beliefs you hold about 1) your self worth, 2) your self worth, and 3) your self worth. When I first started in 2002, my rate was about half of what it is today; my rate is just one reflection of how much I have grown.

So how do you change your fears to possibilities that feed you instead of feeding on you? Imagine your ideal scenario. What would it look like to have the perfect business? How would you feel? Elaborate on what you would ideally do on a daily basis. Focus your energy on feeling happy and well fed by your business. If you could have as many or few clients as you wished what would that number be? If you could charge anything you wished for your services, what would that number be? Allow for more than what you imagine by adding the thought "or better" to the scenarios you choose. What kind of work and location would you prefer? What styles of bodywork would you prefer to perform? Would you prefer to work on people to relieve their pain or pamper them? Every nuance and description helps create what you wish. Read Ask and It Is Given and think of your intention and ideal scene everyday.

Business is only one manifestation of life. Are you someone who knows how to handle money well enough to have a cushion in savings and no debt? Do you handle relationships well enough to have many friends and few enemies? Are you responsible enough to tell the truth and keep your commitments? Are your actions and intentions in alignment (i.e. do you do what you say)? Are you happy with your life?

You really do get what you ask for in life. Set your rates by adding value to yourself and by setting all areas of your life in order. Massage rates in Los Angeles fluctuate between $30-$300. Choose a rate that would make you happy; any limits are self imposed. I have heard of one therapist who does not set a rate and allows everyone to pay according to what they think the session was worth to them and what they can afford; some of his clients are pro bono, but others pay him$1000 a session. It takes confidence and courage to so what he does, but it also shows that you always get what you are worth in the balance.

Whatever you choose to do, do it with the intention for happiness, instead of out of fear for the worst.

Budgeting & Self-Employment

Because I have been self employed for so much of my life, I was already prepared for the highs and lows of working for myself. As in any self-employment situation, you MUST be comfortable living with an income that fluctuates. If you are used to a steady income or want one, then find work in another field with a fixed income, because in a massage context, even working for a spa is a variable income situation. As in any start up situation, it will take some time to build your business and you must have either another source of income or a trust fund to sustain yourself in the meantime. Most people keep their "day jobs" or spa jobs until they grow their massage clientele base enough to cover their basic expenses.

I had to learn how to budget my money and time. I had to learn where to invest for the best return. Accepting a low paying client may be worth it if that client can refer more business to me, but may not be worth it if the time working with that client is taking me away from better paying clients. How did I know know which was which? I set up a time limit to my "introductory" rate which expired unless I got at least one paid referral.

I'll discuss how I set my rates in another post, but this is a good place to mention that if you are a newly self-employed therapist, you should always set up the new referred client at a higher rate (at least $5-$10 more per hour) so that your rates continue to inch up with new business; your original client will feel like they are getting a deal (they are).

I save at least 10-15% in a business savings account and put at least 20-30% into a business checking account to pay for my self-employment taxes, licensing fees, and credential renewals. Yes, all this adds up to about 50% of what I make, which is exactly why it takes time to build a rate and clientele base to a point that will sustain a comfortable lifestyle (comfort to me is being able to pay all my bills with a nice sum leftover to put into savings and play).

Are you a new therapist who is able to budget, comfortable with a fluctuating income, and excited about working for yourself? Read tomorrow's post about setting your rates.

Self Employment or Spa Employment?

Almost everyone gets their first massage at a spa; my first professional massage was at a spa in Calistoga (wine country) back in 1978. Spas provide an "official" environment for therapeutic massage, usually with the added amenities of a steam, sauna and some nice cucumber water. So why would anyone want to work for themselves? Why would anyone want to get a massage outside of a spa?

Ah Grasshopper, you have much to learn....

Spas, gyms, or medical offices (I have worked in all three environments) are usually the starting point for new massage school graduates because they provide what is basically a continuing education course. Think of spas as graduate schools for massage therapists; the students now have some knowledge and skill, but not necessarily experience in the working world. Another practical consideration for many newly graduated students is that the spa provides massage equipment and supplies (a good massage table costs about $1000), a room to work, advertising, and administrative functions that many new therapists can not afford or know how to handle. Providing all this costs money, and that money is taken from the prices charged for services (along with a hefty profit for the spa owner) before the therapist gets paid. Therapists at a spa make anywhere from minimum wage to $60 an hour plus tips. Yes, therapists only take home 15-50% of what the public pays at a spa. Since some spas only pay minimum wage, please TIP the overworked and underpaid therapist who works on you (I will cover tipping in another post). My first job out of massage school was at a high end spa where I made $60 an hour plus tips, but after my shift I would go home and literally lay on the floor completely exhausted after putting in 22 hours over 3 days. One day at the spa I did 8.5 hours of massage without so much as a meal break; I knew that my body and spirit would not be able to endure that pace for long.

After a stint in a spa honing their skills and knowledge, most therapists who have some talent, courage, intelligence, and business sense, become self-employed. The advantages are numerous, first and foremost being the ability to decide and control the hours, location, style, clients, and money aspects of the business. Having all these choices is overwhelming to some people and they are happy staying in the spa environment. Some people have no skill or talent for business and are better off staying in a controlled environment; I have met therapists who prefer a structured workplace and are willing to pay for it (literally).

What do clients get from a self-employed therapist? Usually someone who has worked less than 6 or 8 hours that day, so he or she has more energy for your needs. Clients also get someone who is happier, which is priceless when hiring someone who works so intimately with your body and energy, as anyone who has ever had a stressed, robotic or lazy spa massage already knows; one of my friends said she got a stone massage at a spa where the therapist literally left the room for the entire session after placing the stones on her. A self-employed therapist can take more time to prolong a session to target a problem area, and can reschedule to accommodate an emergency pain relief session (try doing that at a spa). Most self-employed therapists have more skills or talent or both simply because to become self-employed, and to do it successfully, it takes both.

Sometimes it takes doing something to know you don't want to do it anymore. My experience working for other people taught me that I wanted to work for myself because I am the best employer for my services.

Why Work Legally?

I had to do legal and administrative homework to become a licensed massage therapist. Of course many therapists work illegally all over the world without any legal status, but I did not want to be one of them. I went to school, took a written and practical test, got a doctor's note (yes really), got fingerprinted and had the Department of Justice do a background check (yes really), and paid over $300 a year in fees for permits and licenses.

I went through all the hassles and expenses of becoming a legally employed therapist for the simple reason that I like living an easy life. I did it all for the same reason I always put change into a parking meter; I would rather pay a small amount to have ease of mind, rather than risk paying a fine that is ten times more expensive than the fee, all the while feeling stressed as I worry about getting caught trying to work outside the system.

Those who work outside the system range from the terrible and untrained, to the expert and educated who do not have the money, perseverance, or time to go through the legal process; an unlicensed practitioner may be an unskilled illegal immigrant who is desperate to earn money, or an out of state licensed expert who does not want to redo all the schooling and permits to work in this state (New York State requires nearly 10 times more training than some Californian cities require). Even within the state of California, every city has its' own licensing fees and requirements, so a legal therapist in San Francisco may be illegal in Los Angeles and visa versa; I turned down one job offer because the place was located one block outside my city licensed area! A massage license is like a medical or legal license, passing the requirements in one state (or city or county) does not necessarily transfer your credentials or legality. Some states recognize a nationwide certification, but California is not one of them.

The State of California is changing its' massage laws this year so everyone who is legally working as a massage therapist now in the state of California will have the option of joining the statewide certification in September of 2009.

Peace of mind has a price, for me to become a legal massage therapist, the price was $300.

Confessions of a Masseuse

Welcome to my new Blog!

I've been self-employed most of my life in many diverse fields ranging from auto sales to librarian, with some time spent working as a mime, at Club Med in Tahiti, and in security software development. You name a job, and I have probably done it or will soon!

I've been asked by several people to mentor them or give presentations on my experiences in my latest career as a massage therapist, so I decided to share my life and lessons in a blog to help other therapists build their businesses while saving their sanity, and to give clients some insight into what it's like to work with them.

Think of this blog as "The Confessions of a Masseuse".